Longhorn Ranch

New Colchester Gazette November 4, 1861.

Today at Longhorn Ranch our brave boys gave the lop-eared Tories another good drubbing. Eyewitnesses say the enemy commander Col. Rusty Ringpiece was killed and his men routed in fierce hand to hand combat led by the gallant Maj. Frenchie Simmons. Wounded in the attack, Simmons brushed off his injuries as a small price to pay to ensure the rights and freedoms of the great State of Missouri.

Mr & Mrs Stye at The Piggery were most impressed by the martial performance of the New Colchester Volunteers and the fact they didn’t steal any of their fine hogs. In gratitude they  donated an old sow to the regiment for a celebratory hog roast.  Edward D. Malone reporting.

Another great Sharp Practice game in our on-going Missouri 1861 campaign.

Faced with Longhorn Ranch strongly occupied by the Union New Martlesham Minutemen the Confederates decide to hold back in the centre and attempt a double envelopment.

Lieutenants Sanders and Daniels move off to their left where they are initially engaged by Capt Hans Holding’s Union skirmishers.

Frenchie Simmons and Capt Chester Drawers peal off through the woods to the right. Here they are able to concentrate fire on Lt Kitt Bagg’s New Framlingham skirmishers.

Lt Bagg’s men are decimated. Bagg himself is knocked to the ground with a wound and the survivors flee.

Maj Bill Payer holds the Confederate centre, supported by Capt Getya Nickerson. This in retrospect proves to be a mistake as the Confederates have too many good troops in the centre only to pin the Union forces in the ranch, leaving the attack on the left with too few men and too few leaders of rank.

Capt Nickerson decides to lead his men off to reinforce the attack on the right. Then he prevaricates and does nothing much for quite a while until eventually deciding perhaps it would be better to remain in the centre. When Col Sanders returns from leave he will no doubt summon Getya Nickerson for an interview without coffee.

The Union advance on their right begins inauspiciously. Leading his men over a fence Capt Bob Float falls flat on his face much to the amusement of the onlooking cattle. Adding insult to ignominy he lands in something insalubrious — the stench of it reducing his prestige with his men.

Shrugging off the pitfalls of their clumsy leader, the Union troops concentrate accurate fire against the Confederate left inflicting severe casualties. Lt Sanders is killed, leaving 2 companies of the New Colchester Volunteers leaderless. Then Lt Daniels is badly wounded. His skirmish company melts back into the safety of the woods taking the injured Lieutenant with them.

Maj. Stone Waller now leads the Little Framlingham Militia through the cornfield to deliver withering fire on Bill Payer’s Confederates in the Centre. This forces Payer’s men to retreat into the depth of the woods to avoid further devastating volleys.

At this point the Confederates are losing heart. But things are looking up on the right. Encouraged by their success in taking out the Union flank protection, Frenchie leads his men forward in a wild assault against the ranch. His cowboys and ruffians destroy a company of the New Martlesham Minutemen, killing their Commanding Officer in the process. Unfortunately Frenchie is wounded and his cowboys are dispersed with heavy casualties.

With dusk falling both sides return to barracks. The Confederates have failed to take the ranch but they have the ascendancy.

At the celebratory hog roast that evening Frenchie and Daniels show off their wounds as badges of honour to the admiring ladies of New Colchester and drink a toast to the passing of the gallant young Lt Sanders.